Anger By Definition
Anger is perfectly normal and usual human feeling. Sometimes – anger can be healthy. But problem emerges when it is getting out of control and you simply can’t control it anymore.
When that happens, it can become overly destructive and problem causing whether at work, home, or personal relationships by interfering in the quality of your life.
The good news are that you can control anger easier than you think. Having an insight of real reasons behind it, can make the process much easier and manageable, and you will learn how to control your explosive temper.
What Is Up To You
- Understand the feelings hiding behind your anger
- Analyze what kind of situations are triggering it
- And when it does – try deep breathing first
- Try to exercise more heavily
- Share your feelings without any doubt
If you are short fused with boiling temper, there are things that you can do if you are slightly conscious person:
- You can control it
- You can learn how to express feelings by not offending anyone
Control Anger Before Someone Gets Hurt
Being hot-tempered might only cause you pain. Being not able to control anger will hurt everyone around you. You might ruin your good job reputation, your friends and family might turn their back on you, and even worse – you might ruin your long built relationship.
That is the boiling point when you must learn controlling yourself, otherwise you might end up ALONE.
What Is Prime Goal Of Anger Management
People use to think that anger management means suppressing your hot feeling. Anger is perfectly normal feeling and it will always be present no matter what you do.
The true goal here is not suppression of the feeling, but understanding what is behind it, trying to express it in much healthier way and not losing control. By doing so, you get into the problem cool-headed, managing conflicts in much healthier way.
Mastering over it takes time and lot of practice, and eventually it will payoff. By learning how to control it, you will gain much better and happier life you seek.
Which Are The Consequences If You Don’t Master It
It will hurt your physical health
Living under high levels of permanent stress makes you prone to many diseases since bad feelings weaken the immune system. Soon, you will face many health issues.
It will hurt your mental health
Anger consumes a lot of mental energy making you not think clearly. You will find it hard to concentrate and live your life with full capacity. Slowly, it will lead towards anxiety, depression and other mental issues.
It will hurt your career and cost you a job
Heat debates and constructive criticism can be moving force in one company. But being hard-headed not accepting opinions other than yours can be a high cost you’ll be paying. You will lose respect among your colleagues. Do you want that to happen?
It will hurt your relationships
You’ll become a scar-face for many.You will hurt the ones that love you most and that is unforgivable. Having an explosive character and not managing your anger will drive all your friends away, and you don’t want that right?
What Is Behind Your Anger
Anger problems can start early in childhood, especially if you were brought up in angry and screaming environment. If you were a witness in such situations, it must have left scars on your soul without even knowing it. Anger was passed onto you. Traumatic events made you more open to the matter.
What do you cover up
Knowing yourself well might help finding what is the root cause. Is it some kind of embarrassment, shame, insecurity or pain? It is more likely that you are covering up these emotions by anger.
Hard at compromising
You hardly ever compromise thinking your opinions are most valuable. Maybe you’ve learned this if you were raised in a family where anger and demanding were the only way of getting anything. You think that compromising might bring up feelings of failure or even vulnerability.
Hard at expressing emotions other than anger
Does expressing your anger makes you feel tough and in control?
And do you by any chance feel shame, guilt or fear and you use your anger to cover them up? Stay in touch with your feelings and don’t cover them up. Get to know them better.
Anger Warning Signs
There are specific signs showing that anger is coming through you:
- faster breathing
- lack of concentration
- increased heart rate
- tension in shoulders
- abdominal pain etc.
Ways To Cool Down
Once you’ve realized what are the warning signs, it will be easier to handle them. There are some techniques that might help to control anger more.
- understand physical sensations of anger emerge
- breath deeply
- exercise heavily
- try stretching
- massage tension affected areas
- before you explode – count to 10
- focus on present
- find a way to forgive
- try to just LET GO
If nothing of this helps and you don’t know how to handle your anger, maybe it is time to seek some professional help, because if you don’t:
- Your temper will still cause problems at work or in your relationships
- You will feel permanent frustration and anger no matter what you try
- You will find yourself avoiding new events because you are unable control your temper
- Your anger might lead to a physical violence
If any of this can be attributed to you, then it is about time to take control over your temper. You know the old saying : ” You should hold your horses tight”
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