How To Define Argue
Argue as a term always have the same meaning – but spoken differently.The most commonly definitions are:
- to give reasons for or against something
- to contend or disagree in words
- to give evidence of something
- to consider the pros and cons of something
- to prove or try to prove by giving reasons
Putting the term argue in everyday life, depends from variety of situations, but, most commonly is recognizable as argue between couples.
Well, there is no couple that haven’t had any disagreements about certain issues, and you can read all about them right now.
Argue About Expenses
This is the most common of all quarrels and that is why it is the first one on this list. This comes as no surprise, as everybody comes from a different growing background.
If you have had a difficult life, struggling for every cent you’ve made, then, living with a partner who had it all, and is a quite spender, can be tough mountain to tackle most of the time.
Because you want to spend money wisely, acknowledging how to appreciate what you have, while struggling your way up.
In case you are this kind of couple, you are certainly prune to quarrels, and for start – you need a good base for conversation, and thinking patterns makeover if you want to resolve this issue quicker.
It is necessary to discuss who will manage the money and mutual funds as well.
Spending is easy – earning is difficult!
Lack Of Intimacy
If you’ve been a couple for a several years and living together, it may happen the beginner sparkle to vanish. Maybe you don’t feel the same need for each other as you used to…
What happened to the sparkle?
Have you lost it along the way?
It is still there, but you need to make some mutual efforts to make it shine again. A distance in a relationship is common if you live under one roof, have different time and working schedules, and you can hardly see each other,or you see each other too much.
Small distance is healthy, but, if you don’t pay enough attention to the signs – it may become un-repairable. This leads to lack of intimacy, and make the void between two of you even bigger.
And that will become an issue to discuss – sooner or later.
Spending Time Apart
As already discussed, spending some time apart can be healthy choice for a relationship. Meeting new people, or having new experiences – are almost always welcomed.
I bet you’ve tried this and realized how refreshing it can be.
Being apart doesn’t lower you emotions – on the contrary: they became enhanced.
Having a discussion about what each of you thinks or need, can create a healthy balance, and be highly supportive of your individual efforts to have your individual personal and professional lives.
This will help you appreciate the time you spend together even more.
Do a little experiment!
If you don’t have any – you are doomed to fall apart. Having a healthy communication is the basis of all kinds of relationships – especially parents with their kids.
If you have a chronic difficulty to talk about issues, your relationship might suffer severely.
For example, you can always start communication with revealing your ideas for the weekend, or which type of groceries to buy – start with simple things.
Why are you holding back your thoughts?
Shyness, or fear from rejection?
Always speak freely and openly. It is the best way to resolve any kind of issue down the road, whether it concerns the kids, finances, weekend plans, whichever.
Without basic communication skills, such as listening and speaking clearly, it will be hard and almost impossible for your individual needs to be meet in between.
Either you are introvert or extrovert. There is no in-between. If you were ” lucky” enough to be opposite personalities, then showing emotions for some will be easy, and for some will be as extracting a tooth.
Most often,when one or both of you has a difficulty identifying and talking about your emotions in a constructive way, it usually leads to a basic failure to connect on much meaningful and deeper connective level.
As a reaction to (non) handling emotions, it can lead to some basic misunderstandings, and get in the way of your level of intimacy as well.
In case you have these issues, and as more time passes, more negativity will continue to build up, making them harder to sort out.
Whatever you think, or is bothering you – speak up!
Don’t let non expressed emotions to suffocate you and lead your relationship to a downhill!
Speak up and express them.
Emotions exist to be expressed – not withheld.
Delegation Of Duties
When you live together, it is always a good idea to divide the duties, so no one feels overloaded. Decide who takes the trash out, cleans the kitchen counters, does the laundry, ironing, vacuuming, window cleaning, grocery supplies, taking the dogs out etc.
But, this isn’t always come easily to every couple.
Even roommates and those which are not involved in romantic relationship, have occasional disagreements over their preference for who takes certain house duties.
Make a list with tasks and simply stick by it. If you know your in-house obligations, it will be much easier to handle and please do not try to skip.
Most often, couples may work in different parts of the day. Some have a day job, and some a night one. Overlapping schedules to invite people over, can cause many reasons to argue about.
As one is sleepy, the other one is eager to mingle by having friends over.
How to accomplish balance?
Use the weekends for this.
Working week schedules often don’t let us have much social life as everybody is working too, and having families to run. It is quite a mission impossible.
But the weekends are always welcomed for the occasion.
Who is A Night Owl, and Who Is An Early Bird
All people are different. Some are early starters, and some are creatures of the night. In this case, it is quite impossible to match sometimes.
If you want to go to bed early, and your partner isn’t up to it yet, you might feel always alone and abandoned in a way.
If you have a need to sleep with your partner most of the time, let them know why this is important to you – hopefully they will understand.
If you schedules are not in line, at least you should make the effort. If you are always on the opposite side and time schedule – lack of intimacy (as closeness by each other), might hurt the level of healthy bonding.
If it is possible, discuss this issue with your partner, hoping you’ll be understood.
Do You Have Any Issues Waiting To Be Resolved
Everybody has its own past, and nobody should be ashamed of it. Still, if you have some unresolved personal issues from the past, it would be a good thing to deal with them sooner.
If needed, try professional help and don’t let your past interfere with your present, nor your future.
Whatever you need to solve – do it now, otherwise you jeopardize meaningful connectivity in your relationship.
Or, if you were a couple that broke up in the past and got back together, and never fully addressed the underlying reasons for the breakup, they’ll still exist. And will show up all over again.
This will continue to harbor concerns about the stability of the relationship, as well as the reliability of the other person.
Resolve past issues!
A lot of people have good sexual relationships with their partners, and many people have sexual dissatisfaction never admitted.
They can live in a state of deprivation saying nothing about it, and most often they have outside relationships that are often kept in top secrecy, and can lead to serious relationship problems down the road.
If you have unsatisfying sex and you don’t communicate your needs are being met, you’ll end up feeling miserable and seek pleasure somewhere else.
Always try to make an open and honest conversation about your expectations. Talk. It is always better to speak freely, than to ruin a long term relation built with so much effort.
This is a touchy subject, and if you need to, schedule a meeting with a couples therapist and try to solve your problems as soon as possible.
Don’t give up so easy!
And one question for all of you…what do you argue about?
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